..That last hurdle before the finish line- it’s hard to breathe, your body aches, and you wonder if you can really make it. You wonder why it’s so much easier to start than it is to finish. I’m running a race I’m not giving up on. That’s where I’m at with the deceiving eating disorder. These past months I’ve been stretched in ways I didn’t think were possible (figuratively & literally lol). I’m still putting in effort and today I’m pressing forward past the last barriers: finishing meals, snacks, or anything I eat. Most peeps don’t even think about it, but as God’s been peeling back layers about my ED I realize I have a habit of “saving parts of my food for later (despite not feeling full).” Doing so, has been yet another means of holding on to control. Half an apple, half a yogurt, half a bar. Half there, half not. God doesn’t do half-jobs, neither does he half-crap anything he does. So, as he peels back the layers I relate to onions. My third doctor’s visit will be in a couple weeks, I’ll keep you all posted. Thank you for standing on the sidelines and cheering me on. I see the finish line ahead of me. Just a few more steps now. Ahead I spot rest and an end which will bring forth a new beginning. Endurance. You can endure too reader, my friend. That “thing” you’ve been fighting against? The battle’s almost over and the prize, that crown, is just ahead of you. We’re royalty bro.
No halves allowed.